Ways to confront conflicts in business relations
Regardless of which conflict you settle, you almost always have to deal with the intricacies of various interests. Their interdependence makes the contradictions at work particularly opaque.
The desire to assess the relevant relationships and quickly affect them indicates a lack of experience in solving interpersonal problems. To conflicts that affect only your job satisfaction, but perhaps your professional future, you should not be treated so easily, so think carefully about what needs to be done! Not every problem is worth disputing. Take the time to clarify your own interests. Find out how important in fact for you is this conflict and the underlying problem. Try to foresee the further development of the conflict and assess the consequences of its possible escalation. Imagine what consequences - intentionally or not - such a conflict could have for you. In this case, consider, along with his professional, and personal life.
The degree of importance for you of a certain disagreement should be established not depending on your immediate interest, but depending on what consequences it will bring to you in the future. Find out what impact the relevant conflict situation will have on the following aspects of your life:
- your health, i.e. physical and emotional well-being;
- your satisfaction with work, i.e. your interest in your work and the extent of your participation in it, the bosses and circle of your colleagues, the working atmosphere, as well as the prestige of the enterprise;
- your professional prospects, i.e. related to your career career opportunities and future plans;
- your personal connections, i.e. people (or people) with whom you have close and reliable relationships;
- your social contacts, i.e. circle of your friends and acquaintances;
- your financial situation, i.e. your income and status;
- your secret dreams of a future life, i.e. how and in what circumstances would you like to live in the future.
You are more likely to avoid conflict or have made a conscious decision to join it. What do you need? Of course, the action plan.
Develop a strategy for your actions in a conflict of interests and opinions. The sequence of your actions will help to influence the decisive aspects of the conflict. At the same time, you will create the best prerequisites for active management of the conflict.
What steps are needed to implement your strategy? Suppose you developed a special flair for possible sources of conflict and early recognized the first signs of tension, assessed their degree of interest in solving this problem, and looked at the conflict potential. You know at what stage of the conflict you are in. Now we are talking about how to arm ourselves for confrontation.
In the first three stages, you will need abilities and competence to assert your position in a conflict situation. In the next stages, you should try to influence the course of the conflict.
1. First of all, you need to gain confidence in yourself, in the correctness of your decisions and actions. This is necessary in order to keep a clear head, even in confusing situations.
2. To decide on active intervention in the course of the conflict is possible only on the basis of positive self-esteem and a sense of own importance. You must make certain efforts not to fall into the vicious circle of negative emotions. Develop in yourself and in the future a positive attitude, the desire for success.
3. You will soon realize that to achieve the goal you need to get a new look at things and develop a new manner of behavior. This will require the willingness to think and talk about yourself and others, about your personal and business, about the past, the present and the future. In conflict resolution, communicative abilities and competence in social issues are of far greater importance than professional knowledge. Develop your abilities of self-expression and self-organization, as well as the ability to cope with the stressful situation.
4. "One in the field is not a warrior" - this truth is applicable to behavior in a conflict situation, so take care of support. Find your allies. Do not neglect professional help - and you will see that there are specialists who take you seriously and are ready to help with advice and deed. Solidarity and support can be obtained from people who have already experienced something similar, so include in your plans the involvement of a group of psychological help. Not the last place should be the preservation of personal ties. Even in a stressful situation, forget your soul mate, friends and just good acquaintances. On the contrary, discuss with him your further actions.
5. From your own experience, as well as from conversations with friends and colleagues, you probably know how different people react to problems. Conflicts at work are not an exception to this rule. Thus, it is important to develop various options for action and compare them with each other. Set priorities and find the most promising way to resolve the conflict.
6. Create opportunities to get in touch with your opponent. Try to establish relations with him that will make your conversation possible. Only in this way will you have the opportunity to translate your plans and reflections into practical actions.
7. But at the same time, separate the emotional conflict (conflict of relations) from prosaic business problems. With this delimitation, it will be easier for you to concentrate on the nature of the contradictions.
8. Attempt to establish a relationship will be successful only if you tune in to your opponent. Since each person reacts in his own way, you must be ready to understand different models of thinking and thinking, different mentality and behavior.
9. To get closer to resolving the conflict, you must first talk with each other. In this case, you must remember the basic rules of communication. Take care of a calm atmosphere, try to overcome possible barriers.
10. If you manage to take charge of the conversation, you will get an ideal starting point for defending your interests. Hss try to dominate your opponent and do not let him feel that he is losing. If your opponent feels that he was pinned to the wall, the conflict will only worsen. Rather, you should try to draw the main attention to the problem and try to convince the enemy of the need for its joint solution. In other words: if you want to advance on the way to solving the problem, you will have to meet your opponent, even if it is not easy. And this means that you must be prepared for a compromise.
11. You should develop alternative plans of action and carefully weigh them. To do this, we need to collect as much information as possible. Talk to people who can evaluate your situation, and only then make a decision. Develop a strategy for implementing the decisions taken.
12. Look to the future with confidence. Do not get stuck in the conflict. Take care of its final elimination. Demonstrate pleasure in this matter - only so you will conquer a lasting peace. Look forward - do not back!
The conflict resolution strategy:
• Look to the future!
• Make a decision!
• Be prepared for compromises!
• Talk to each other!
• Tune on your opponent!
• Establish a personal relationship!
• Consider the plan of action!
• Find allies!
• Increase your competence in social issues!
• Gain confidence!
Conflicts can not be avoided: is it conceivable for all the time of professional activity not to meet colleagues with a difficult character or incapable superiors? In order to meet disagreements with the necessary calmness, first of all need a strong self-confidence. Work on your self-esteem, on the one hand, not to fall into the vicious circle of negative emotions, and on the other - to accumulate a positive experience and learn to increase it, striving for success. Of course, in words everything is simple. There are some practical principles, adhering to which you can strengthen self-esteem.
If you have more than once fallen into a similar trap of negative emotions and feelings, then, most likely, have already developed such protective behavior. By not wanting, you are thus trapped in a vicious circle of interdependence, from which you must necessarily break away.
To break out of such a vicious circle, you must be ready to reconsider your views. However, this takes time: it is impossible to change attitudes and behavior in one day. By you know: even the longest path begins with the first step.
The following action plan will help you understand what you need to do to get rid of the negative ways.
1. Your nerves are pretty shabby. Take the timeout. Leave the conflict field for at least a few days.
2. The only thing you need is rest. Leave the case. Stay in a peaceful environment among the pleasant people.
3. Be yourself. Disconnect. Let your head rest. Try to prevent you from being hindered and distracted.
4. Begin to ponder the conflict. Remember. Understand your impressions and experiences. Make a diary of the conflict. Try to express your thoughts, feelings in words and write them down.
5. In doing so, analyze your own behavior. List your successes and failures. Identify your strengths and weaknesses.
6. Think about how you can change and improve the situation at work. Remain at the same time a realist. Set yourself specific goals, as soon as possible, set the deadlines for achieving them.
7. Take your time and do not force anything. Move forward step by step. Be based thus on the positive experience. Be thoroughly prepared for the beginning of a new path. So you catch a tail wind and gain new strength.
8. Do not give up help from the outside. Think about what kind of support you need and how you can get it. Look for allies.
As a rule, conflicts signal uneasy relations in a team, therefore, along with the ability to communicate (communicative ability), a certain competence in social issues is a necessary prerequisite for successful regulation of interpersonal conflicts.
Is it painful for you to ask uncomfortable questions or criticize? Are you trying to please others just to stand out? Your fear of certain situations or people is so great that you avoid them?
If you answered these questions in the affirmative, then probably your behavior is determined by social fears that prevent you from proving your case in disputes and other conflict situations. But social fears can be learned to win. Use the following tips:
First of all, do not waste energy for nothing. This will also help in overcoming conflicts. Your state of health should not be indifferent to you. Anyone who is forced from day to day to fight at work must be in shape and have enough strength, so take care of pauses for relaxation and recreation. In this you can help different methods and time allocation.
Most adult educational institutions (for example, evening education courses), as well as many organizers of seminars on economics offer psychological training in management and behavior, developing and improving competence in social issues. Do not hesitate to take advantage of these suggestions!
Do not depend on your work.
The one who puts self-esteem in dependence on work inevitably raises problems: professional success or failure governs life and determines the feeling of satisfaction and dissatisfaction. There is a violation of identification. Specifically, this means the following: when you come into contact with other people, you do it not as a person, which in fact is, but only as a certain work unit. The more you are internally oriented to work, the more likely it is. Even when you do not touch topics related to work, you determine your personal and social status only through it. If you are not very proud of your professional achievements, the opposite phenomenon can also occur. You feel lower than others and always fear that the conversation may touch work. In this case, discussions about your situation at work have a high conflict potential for you. If the work determines your whole life, you will regard any criticism of your work activity as an attack and react accordingly, so try to get rid of this attitude to yourself.
How to counteract the violation of identification?
Determine the size of the violation of your identification associated with work. For this purpose, write as many answers as possible to the question "Who am I?". The number of answers is not as important as their content, so carefully review the list. How often does it mention work? How do you define yourself? By means of things or other people, through past or future achievements? How many of your personal views, qualities and values are reflected in the list? Much of what you think you are is closely related to work? Think about it. Ask yourself: "What does this mean for my self-esteem?" A certain degree of identification with work is good, by too much makes you vulnerable to conflict.
Restore balance, devote more time to your second half, family, friends. Find interests outside of work for yourself. Find out what you really want in this life!
Conflicts take such forms that without help it is difficult to prove their rightness, to everyone find support. Take advantage of the opportunities available in the enterprise: lately information, consulting, and all other opportunities of enterprises are constantly growing.
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